Peaks And Troughs

Today's Results:
Horse Racing... 0.9% loss. New bank... £867.31

Today, after a long, frustrating and quite frankly, demoralising day saw me lose the hard fought £8.30 I'd won yesterday. How I got away with such a small loss, I'll never know.

My confidence has been slowly ebbing away since last Saturday. A general malaise has descended on my trading that I'm beginning to think what skills I have developed have deserted me. It has resulted in me making not only bad trades, but bad decisions. I'm getting involved in races I shouldn't; picking runners at odds I usually have difficulty with; trying to force trades that aren't there; and generally making far too many mistakes. I seem to have hit a brick wall this week.

Today started badly. I'd dropped my stakes a bit so that I could concentrate on trading, rather than losing money. I was down £5 after the first three races. Not a lot I know and under normal circumstances, it wouldn't bother me. But I'm not trading 'normally'.

This poor start made me make, in retrospect, my first poor decision of the day. I decided that, if I was destined to lose money today, I might as well lose it while trying to learn how the win markets work. 'Stupid Boy' as Capt Mainwaring used to say.

I slashed my stake to £50 and off I went - and promptly lost on the first five races I entered. I wanted to try and filter out the noise from the trend, so I was prepared to hold my position a bit longer. I paid close attention to the streaming graphs and when I was happy, in I'd go. Every bloody time I wound up either backing on a peak or laying in a trough. I was pulling my hair out - not that I have much left to pull.

This only served to drop my confidence levels still further. I switched to the place markets whilst continuing with the lower stakes. This in itself was frustrating as my stakes where now at a level I haven't been for over 2 months. Despite this, I was still trading in a somewhat haphazard manner with a seemingly complete lack of ability in reading the markets.

By the time the afternoon session ended, I was £20 down. Again, not a huge amount to some traders, but when you consider I'd managed to get myself up to £25-£50 per day, this is a significant sum.

In the evening session I decided that if I had any chance of recovering some of those losses, I had to raise my stakes again and take the risk. I promptly lost the opening race. Oh dear!

To be honest, I'd almost got to the stage where I didn't care anymore - a dangerous place to be. Fortunately, that was the last loss of the day. I did, finally, manage to put a few good trades together towards the end of the evening session, with lots of scratched trades in between. So I'm a little happier than I was at dinner time.

I'm going to see how tomorrow goes, then decide what I'm going to do next. I don't know why I seem to have had such difficulty this week, though certainly, I've let the negative mental aspects effect me. I may very well take a break for a few days as I've been doing this almost everyday since February. In any case trading may be limited over the next two weeks anyway as my daughter is on school holidays and she'll be back from her mother's on Monday.

I also feel that I've lost sight of what I was trying to do. I've been caught up in how well I've been doing since starting with £10 at the end of Feb that I've forgotten that this was meant to be a hobby. If I want it to be more than that, then that's fine, but I need to get that clear in my own mind.

Hoping for better things tomorrow.

P.S. I've just realised that this is my 100th post to this blog. It doesn't seem that many but if so, it's amazing that some people actually still read my ramblings and almost continuous self-criticism. Thanks to you all.

2 comments:

Pete Thunder said...

Well, buddy, as sorry as i am to hear of your loss, i still get a good laugh reading about your self deprecation. I mean, you got 10 Pounds to 900, and even taking into account the costs associated with your trading, you have managed to come on top. There are THOUSANDS of people, me included, who cant get near THAT on an even, consistent basis.
So, you lost your "mojo", i still have to find mine, so i guess you are in advantage.
Be grateful you can do and move forward.

Alistair said...

LOL!

I've had this very conversation with Leon over at Don't Give Up The Day Job. One of my many faults is the tendency to take my successes for granted and let my failures bug the hell out of me. Just a symptom of my naturally pessimistic character I suppose.

"We're doomed, doomed".

I've no idea why I've started quoting from that old BBC sitcom, 'Dad's Army'.

I hope you find your 'mojo' soon mate.

Alistair